Monday, September 11, 2006

Beefing up

So before Karla and I left on our holiday, I entered a raffle to support a work colleague's chorus. She and her chorus are raising funds to be in a choral competition in Las Vegas (not a topless choral competition, I was assured).

So, for five bucks in exchange for three tickets, I entered. The prize? A quarter of beef. What's a quarter of beef? Here's a quarter of beef:



Help a friend out, right? Not that a quarter of beef would ever fit inside my apartment sized fridge/freezer. I mean, that would just be a joke, right? Right. But five bucks towards a worthy cause and what are the chances, right?

Well the joke's on me my friends. A lovely woman named Liz left a message this morning while Karla and were still away to let me know that I've won "a huge amount of meat" after being one of the names drawn in the raffle. I have the honor of travelling out to a factory in Petone to claim my prize some time this week.

The question is: what the heck am I going to do with all this beef? There is NO WAY it's going to be able to stay here. Can I rent freezer space? Another thought might be a 'beef party', where we give away free meat after making people enter silly competitions.

Please, any other thoughts? I'm in a fix here, since it is now clear that no good deed goes unpunished.

Help!

12 comments:

Speaka said...

mmmm....lots of meat....

Margaret said...

That was pretty funny....
a raffle prize should be
a trip, or a day at the Spa,or a fancy meal...!!
Anyway, you know what you're cooking for supper for the next few months!
If you're looking for suggestions....maybe the local foodbank?
Love to you both,
Margaret

wayne said...

Hey Dave - Congratulations - rib steaks - my fav- yumm! As far as the hamburger etc. goes I have a suggestion. On the path going up the hill from your place - about the same distance as it is when you are descending to Lampton Quay- is Victoria University. At the top and directly across the street is a set of converted houses which hold the Aboriginal unit of the university (46/48/50 Kelburn Parade). In behind the three or four buildings is the Marae (sp) where they conduct welcomming ceremonies. Adjacent to the Marae is a kitchen with a very friendly cook who prepares meals for the students and for ceremonial purposes. The senior lecturer/elder is Te Rip Owai Higgins at 202-46 Kelburn Parade - (ph. 463-5465)- email -teripowai.higgins@vuw.ac.nz. Karla knows her and you may still have her home phone number from my visit. I'm sure they would have the facilities to accept some of your cache, and I'm sure would be most appreciative of any offering.

Anonymous said...

WELL HI KARLA AND DAVE IT IS SO GOOD TO BE ABLE TO SEND YOU THESE SMAL MESSAGES [1] KARLA IT WOULD BE SO GOOD IF YOU WERE CHOOSE TO GOB TO VEGAS SO GOOD LUCK [YOU HAPPY GUYS] NOW [2]DAVE SO PLEASED YOUR FIVE DOLLAR INVESTMENT TURNED OUT SO WELL BUT WHAT YOU WERE ASKING WHAT TO DO WITH SUCH A LARGE AMOUNT OF CHOICE MEAT I WOULD SAY PICK THE BEST CUTS FOR YOUR OWN USE AND GIVE A FEW TO YOUR FRIENDS WHAT IS LEFT DONATE IT TO A HALFWAY HOUSE OR A SOUP KITCHEN, YOU ARE SURE HAVING A SPELL OF GOOD LUCK DAVE THE PRETTIEST GIRL IN THE COUNTRY MY GRAND DAUGHTER BUT BUT DAVE YOUR LUCK MAY NOT BE EVERLASTING BUT I SAW YOU TACKLE ONE OF THE PLAYERS IN THE GAME, WELL JUST KIND FELT THAT I HAVE A SORT OF ASORE ARM WELL YOUR LUCK MAY LAST , LOVE YOU BOTH AMMA AND AFI

Karnage said...

This is what you do, put as much in the freezer as you can. Then cook everything else and have contests to see how much beef you can eat in a certain time period. 30 seconds, 5 minutes, an hour, a day, whatever, until all the cooked meat is gone. I suggest you get some friends in on it too. Then you can take your time with the stuff in the freezer.

Oh, and be sure you're eating nothing but meat, veggies will fill you up and stop you from winning.

Graham

k80 said...

I've been procrastinating on going through the rigamaroll (sp?) of setting up a Blogger account. However! I just couldn't pass this one up!

As much as the zaniness of a beef party does tempt me...I wouldn't be fulfulling my duties as the do-gooder of the Hume siblings, without suggesting that you make arrangements to donate the beef to a local foodbank. They are always desperate to get access to fresh protein for their clients instead of just refined flour and carbohydrates!

k80 said...

I forgot...or a residential addictions treatment program!

Love,

The Do-gooder

Dave said...

Okay, 'do-gooder' sibling (or should I say 'Self-righteOR'?), if you're so good how come you made our poor mother bake several hundred of your 'girl-guide' cookies for your recent little trip to Burning Man fest, eh?

Of course you and Karla's Mum, Amma and Afi are totally right. I put a call into the Wellington City Mission tonight, and I'm going to sort out getting them the meat. I'll also see about getting some to the Marae as well. Good to spread the good luck around.

Incidentally--I learned today the prize of meat is worth $1200! Crazy, eh?

G-Plum said...

Dude, you should be able to buy a small apartment-size freezer for less than $100. Given the cost of beef, this is a good investment. Other options include sharing your new found wealth with your friends. Pick the beef up and have friends meet you at your place to divy the loot. Maybe ask for a nice bottle of wine in exchange.

wayne said...

Dave,
You sure have received some good suggestions - the wine lottery/exchange has promise- I'll back you on your next ticket.
As for the food bank idea, despite the high callibre of people suggesting it,(do-gooders and otherwise - my family essentially) I must comment - Firstly it was wonderfull to hear from K80.
I have;however,held for some time (perhaps too long) to the view that food banks/missions, and support for such, are acknowlegments and implied acquiesence for the fact that our public social/policy need not ensure that everyone has access to adequate, ample,safe and nutritional food; and essentially take our governments are "off the hook" in the rsponsibilty to provide basic needs (ie. food and shelter to all its citizens).
As for sacrificing and the possibly starving students - they - (we - at some points in our lives perhaps) have endured that struggle and challenge in many cases - through our own choice of course. Therefore; despite being out voted, I very much appreciate your consideration for the students at Victoria University.
Good going!!

Oh Yes --
Down with Food Banks - Up with Adequate Public Policy.

Dave said...

I love the slogan!

Can I send that comment to the Winnipeg Free Press, candidate Helgason? ;-)

wayne said...

thank you but - no - while I am committed to social justice - little to no opportunity exists at the municipal level in Winipeg on these issues - not public health or social services - only police involvement and emergency health responses.
Therefore I have decided not to spend my depleting and residual energy on roads and sewers.